I remember the election cycle
prayer vigils of my youth.
The fasting.
The fear.

Scared people in
church sanctuaries
passing terrified glances
instead of peace,
begging God not to let
destruction fall on the
United States in the form
of a Democrat winning
the Oval Office.

I now know not all churches,
but the ones that formed
my first understandings
had these fears as
blocks in their foundation.

Many cycles later,
I sat in community with dear friends
in a different kind of church
and held space for our own
anxiety and concern.

Not because we
believe one party holds
the key to bring about
the world we want,
but because there is
so much fear,
so much division
so much hate
and we know
there are some trying
fan those flames into
an inferno.

Holding space in silence,
I couldn’t help but think
of all the other people
in all those other churches
still holding their vigils
like a presidential candidate
could take the place of Christ
as their savior.

How can entire churches
praying to the same God
as me be filled with people
praying for such different things
than me?

How are our only choices
a neo-liberal conservative woman
and a fascist man?

How is this
where we are?

How do we stop
looking to political parties
as though they
represent us,
care about us,
can save us?

How do we bring about
anything different from
what we’ve always had
if all we are is afraid?

How do we let go of
the fears ingrained in us
and see with clarity?

How do we remember
that we are not
separate from each other
no matter how much
those in power want us to
behave as though we are?

How can we
find the courage
to be “us” and not
the “me vs. you”
they want to maintain?

How?