^{Content Note: Mention of cancer, medical situations, parental illness}

I read somewhere that
a woman develops
all the ova her ovaries will ever produce
while still in the womb of her mother,

so for a time,
the woman’s mother carries
within her body
both her daughter and the spark
of the next generation.

I do not know if this is medically accurate,
but I recall it now
as I take a turn sitting next to
my mom in the oncology unit,
as they pump her full of IVs that will potentially
both sicken and save her.

My body,
once within hers,
now beside,
would not exist
if not for the places in her body
where they found the cancer.

It makes me think how
discussing mothers,
daughters,
women’s bodies,
can be double-edged.

Joy and pain,
hope and grief,
love and uncertainty–
emotions so often
within each other,
beside each other.

I wonder now how I hold them,
along with my
mother’s hand and her hot tea,
here in this room
on a rainy December afternoon.